Yeah this'll be fun I think

Alright I guess here's a precursor or something? I'm not really listening to music right now and this website took a long time to set up, so I'm kinda bored with typing right now and kinda just want to jump into the episode. Not fully sure how I want to approach this though, since it's gonna require a lot of rewatching scenes by switching the language. Maybe I'll open two tabs. Let me see if that works.

(Here's the Discord conversation I stole this from btw)


alright, I've been a bit distracted, let's get into this thing.

Alright alright alright, how am I gonna do this? Am I just gonna watch every scene in Japanese audio, THEN watch the dub? Oh wait I totally forgot, the subs stay the same whether the audio's English or not. And the subs are VERY different from the English script (arguably much better too). Okay, ready? Let's go (I'll watch in Japanese on my phone too I guess).

Okay I already hate Retsuko's english voice. The elephant president guy is fine I guess, idk still sounds off, but maybe that's just because I'm used to the Japanese audio. Retsuko's voice is terrible though, sounds like this Minecraft channel my sister used to watch, Aphmau. I know this scene she's supposed to be excited, but I've watched some dub before and she has NO OTHER EMOTION, but in the Japanese audio, they put SO MUCH emotion into the voice, you can tell so much. This is also funny cause I've got them pretty much exactly synced up. I have a hypothesis that English episodes are shorter cause they edit it around shorter dialogue, but so far, they're exactly the same. Okay yeah, this first scene, the English voice still sounds excited n shit even though she's sleeping and she very much is dreading the following day. To be honest, the Japanese one doesn't have too much emotional range either, but at least she doesn't sound flippin excited.

Alright, counting to ten, this is the FIRST major variance from the subtitles. Instead of saying "I'll count to ten" she says "just ten more seconds," I guess it's not that big of a difference, but something that's important in the series is Retsuko's repetition of the line. Makes me wonder if in the English dub, they'll keep saying "just ten more seconds" or if they'll change it up (that would be bad because the repetition is important n shit!!) Okay I don't care about syncing these up anymore, I'm just gonna watch English with subs. Maybe I'll rewatch some scenes in Japanese audio to get the emotion out of them again. Also instead of saying "that's everything" she says "I'm three for three". Pretty minor edits though, nothing really gamechanging yet. So I can still rant about hating Retsuko's voice or something. Everything's basically the same so far I guess.

Okay here's a difference I'll make from the other guy on Discord: I'm not gonna document every change, I'll just list the notable ones while I rant about it.

Most of it is essentially the same so far, although I remember some scenes where things were a LOT different. This is basically like whoever wrote the script wasn't the same translator as the subtitle translator right now though.

Okay, why the flip does Tsunoda sound EXACTLY like Retsuko? Her voice was supposed to be different, much more cutesy and bouncy (in the Japanese audio, it fits that by being a lot more flowy, basically what I'm saying is THEY'RE DISTINCTLY DIFFERENT VOICES) whereas it's just exactly the same. Are they the same voice actor? No, they're different people apparently. Why do they sound exactly the same???

Ooh, first major difference! I can't actually decide which version pulls this off better. So it's when Tsunoda notices Retsuko's crocs, in the subs, she doesn't say anything about it, making it a bit more subtle. But in the dub, she says the ultra passive aggressive "if I ever want to live up to your example, I've got some really big shoes to fill" which is actually kinda hilarious, I'll give it that. But less accurate to Tsunoda's character, she was never passive aggressive. I don't think. I don't know, I only watched this whole show once a week ago, this is my rewatch. This is still the season where they all hate Tsunoda. Also next difference: In the sub, Retsuko acknowledges her crocs by trying to explain them saying "Oh, these sandals? I'm such an idiot," when in the dub, Retsuko pretends like she just noticed the crocs saying "how did those get there?" Sorta changes the context a bit I'd think, cause Retsuko lies whereas she didn't before, but I guess it doesn't change much in the grand scheme of things.

Alright... time for my least favorite voice actor performance. Kabae. Oh my gosh why I know she's supposed to be annoying or whatever, but jeeeeezzz she does NOT sound natural. This whole thing just sounds like YouTube man I hate this dub. Okay also I just hate Kabae's English dialogue. Especially when that one girl enters the room and Kabae directs her attention towards her. It just sucks man. Maybe this won't be fun, this is just kinda depressing.

Fenneko, my favorite character, surely you won't disappoint me?? (I've already seen clips of this, I know her voice and... mannnnnn). She sounds. Like Watch Mojo. She Sounds like flipping Watch Mojo WHYYYYYYYY. It's not THAT bad of a performance, but it's THIS EXACT VOICE that made me hate Chromebook Ads. I described it before as a very particular sarcastic patronizing advertising voice, and here it is again. Maybe that's not the best description, cause that's the part of Fenneko's character that's the best, but I hate this voice. I hate the chromebook ads, please don't make me listen to four seasons of chromebook lady pleaseeeeeeeeee. Okay also I hate the way these English actors pronounce the names. I guess there's no better way to, it's just really weird hearing these very very American voice actors pronouncing only Japanese names.

Oh woah, this is something I never noticed. Whereas in later episodes, they call the main social media Instagram (to the point where they're all on-the-nose about mentioning the name), but in this first episode it's just drawn as "Social Net". Here's why I finally noticed this: in the subs, it says "I'm following her online." Sounds natural. However, in the dub, Fenneko says "I'm following Tsunoda on social media," like who says that??? Who specifically inserts "social media" after talking about following somebody?? Sounds a lot more unnatural I think.

Director Ton and Komiya also sound like YouTube. Komiya also doesn't sound high pitched like he's supposed to. Whatever, it's minor, just more YouTube voice acting, we haven't gotten to Haida yet.

The death metal scene is actually 100% accurate to the subtitles. Although, significantly less noisy, cause English people have to understand it and don't really have the subtitles to go to (plus there's Japanese text written underneath it). I don't like the death metal scenes that much, it's good there's less of them as the show goes on. It was sorta like season 1's urchin in the desert to get the show off the ground (although the Sanrio animation was enough to do that I think) but I guess it's integral. Of course I like the Japanese version more since it's noisier, and of course I'm a huge fan of noise music.


Ohhhh, here comes Haida. So. This is why I watched the dub.

Dude I looked up this guy. He's the flippin main character of Alpha and Omega. And that's ALL I've seen from him, so no this guy did NOT write my childhood. Apparently he was in Kids Next Door but I never watched that. All I can think about when hearing him is Alpha and Omega. He doesn't really give a very good performance either, he sounds like Alpha and Omega and not business Haida. Sounds like performing for a kids show. Also no emotion, this guy has minimal emotional range, whereas Haida's Japanese voice actor arguably has the MOST emotional range, capturing SO much emotion in his speech, I love Japanese Haida so much. Another weird difference, they go into a tangent where Haida calls Fenneko and Retsuko "girls" where in the sub he just say "It's not that easy," and Fenneko doesn't even get to say her line "thanks for the internet wisdom," cause she's too busy retorting to English Haida's line and saying "call us girls one more time," then it goes back to normal after he corrects himself to "women". Idk, it's just weird that an entire Fenneko joke gets changed for something less funny. Cause Fenneko isn't the "call us girls one more time" type, she's not just a flippin Tsundere. Sidenote, the dub has a lot more swears than the sub, Director Ton says "ass", and Fenneko says "damn" in places where the subs had just the lines.

Director Ton golf scene! Weird differences here, I guess last scene is where they really started to pick up. For some reason Ton invites Tsunoda to golf instead of Tsunoda inviting herself. Also Ton just keeps talking instead of saying the "Pork noodles! Extra pork!" chant while swinging. Weird cause he's supposed to do the flippin chant broski!! That's the big joke ya tools!! Also weirdly, Tsunoda never says "Amazing" even though that's what's key later in the series (maybe it's the same episode? Actually I don't think it is, pretty sure that's in episode 5).

Another Fenneko "damn" for some reason where there wasn't one. I hate how Haida pronounces "Washimi". BRO GORI SOUNDS LIKE RETSUKO PULLING A BAD SOUTHERN ACCENT WHY? Other than her SLIGHT southern twang (I don't know what that's about, and I had to double take to figure out if 'southern' was what I was hearing) she sounds exactly the same as Retsuko and Tsunoda. Washimi at least sounds different. Still like YouTube. Or a high school play. The dialogue's just off man, they don't pull it off, maybe this just wasn't meant to be read in English.

Nooo Fenneko don't say "chill game" that's gross!

Kabae is worse than earlier. Still stilted as flip, but actually worse. I don't really know how else to say it but like, her words are very staccato, and in perfect eighth notes. Ya know? If you don't, just watch it, you'll know what I'm talking about.

I hate Retsuko's self introduction in both versions, the English one's still more annoying. NOOO THE BABOON WHY DOES HE SOUND SO POLITE??? HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE INTIMIDATING, BUT HE'S JUST ALL POLITE?!?!?!!?

Yeah the death metal scenes are worse because you can actually understand her. That was a big point in the Japanese one that you couldn't understand her, much more cringe now that you can actually HEAR the lyrics (the scenes were a bit *that* originally already)

This guy's voice is okay I guess. idk. Very last line is a total contradiction of the subtitles. Dude says that he's bringing in what she ordered or whatever, and Retsuko in the subs says "I didn't order anything," while in the dub says "leave it on the table". I guess her english version fits that more 'responsible' characteristic as discussed in the following episode. When reading the subs and listening to Japanese audio, 'responsible' didn't seem like the appropriate word to describe what they were talking about with Retsuko. I wonder if the dub actually corrects that. Anyways, there you go, episode one done. This took a very long time wow.

So THIS is top notch? For a dub? Are dubs just usually SO much worse than this??? Cause this isn't very good, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have watched this whole show if I watched it in English audio. Whatever.